Finding Grace During the Holidays

This is a tricky month for me. Usually, I am the "Yeah, it’s Christmas!" kinda gal! Last year, I was definitely not that gal, and this year feels even worse as I am about to lose another close family member.

Traditions started changing last year, and this year is no different. I’m not going to lie—what was once such an exciting time feels complicated and emotionally unbalanced. It is difficult not to sit in the sadness and reflect on what once was, focus on what I am missing and what I will miss. Maybe even feel victimized by all of it. I mean, why not?! It sure as hell isn’t fair, is it?

But I’m trying to do it differently this year. Instead of thinking about what it’s going to be like without them and essentially setting myself up for sitting in sadness for 25 days of the month, I’m going to focus on December from the perspective of “it’s a day-by-day kinda thing!”

I felt inspired by working on my 12 Days of Christmas Cheer for the collective. Even in my sadness and grief, I can turn away from the constant emptiness and try to fill it—without the expectation of anything working or not working. If I don’t try, I won’t know, right?

My thoughts and emotions are valid, and I won’t be suppressing or ignoring them. I will honour them. If Dec. 2 comes and I’m sad and want to cry, I will! I just won’t let it define me for the whole day. If Dec. 12 comes and I want to call up friends and say, “Let’s go for a quick dinner—I’m feeling the mood for company,” I will (and hopefully someone will be able to come on short notice lol). If I’m invited to a party and say yes, but on the day of, I can’t do it, I’ll be A.O.K. calling and cancelling. If I want to watch a Christmas show but turn it off in the middle because it’s too much, I will give myself grace.

There’s no right or wrong way to work through the holiday season. It doesn’t matter if you love the holiday season or if it brings you down. You have the free will to work through it in any way you can, and don’t you worry about what others are doing or thinking. You do you. Trust that you are intuitively working with a higher source that’s just like, “Hey, grrrlll (or guy), WE GOT YOU!” It’s your personal responsibility to be authentically you at this time of year.

Wishing you all the love, joy, peace, and harmony you need to make this holiday season whatever you need it to be!

Tara Diana